The airport was swarming with people as Jen and Joey scanned LAX, looking for Clark, Dawson's chauffeur, who was supposed to meet them.  Joey finally spotted the sign that read "Potter and Parker" and waved her hands above her head. 

The sign came down as Clark made his way through the crowd to the two women.  "Ladies," he said, smiling at them.

"Hey Clark," Joey said, giving the older man a big hug.  "It's been a long time."

"Too long Miss Joey," he said, returning her hug.

"Hey," Jen cut in.  "Don't hog the cutest looking chauffeur in the city.  Let me get one of those hugs."

Joey laughed and moved back so that Jen could hug Clark.

"Look at you Mrs. Parker," he said, once Jen had released him.  "I must say that marriage agrees with you."

Jen beamed.  "You know what?  I think it does."

Joey glanced at her friend curiously.  Jen had been acting weird all morning.  She was hiding something and Joey was dying to know what it was.  "Jen, what's going on with you?"

Jen gave Joey a confused look.  "What do you mean Jo?"

"You've been acting weird all day.  What gives?"

"Later," Jen said, giving Joey a quick wink as they followed Clark out of the airport. 

Dawson lived on a secluded stretch of beach with a sprawling beach house nestled on it.  Clark stopped the car in front of the house and opened the back door for the girls who climbed out, stretching.  Dawson was waiting on them and ran down the steps to greet them, engulfing Jen and Joey in a three-person hug. 

"I'm so glad you guys made it," he exclaimed.

"Hey Dawson," Jen said, patting him on the back.

"It's great to see you," Joey added, giving him an affectionate peck on the cheek.

Dawson let go of them and stood back to assess their physical appearances.  "You both look great."

"Well, Dawson," Jen drawled, spinning around.  "I'm so flattered that you noticed."

"Yeah," Joey agreed, striking a pose.  "You know, it's all those fashion shows, sushi and ex-lax."

All three of them laughed. 

"Come on inside," Dawson told them, linking his arms through theirs.  "Clark, do you mind getting their bags by yourself?"

"Not at all sir," Clark said, smiling.  "You go ahead and enjoy your guests."

Dawson's house had six bedrooms.  On their first visit here six years ago Jen had asked Dawson why he had so many rooms and he had explained that there was a room for each of his friends, a room for himself and an extra guest bedroom for when his parents came out to see him.  He had designed each room to fit the personality of whoever would be occupying the room.  This meant that each room had a different color scheme and furnishings.  Andie's was bright yellow and off-white with a huge window overlooking the sea, Jack's was dark blue with walnut furniture, Jen's was black and white with an antique iron bed frame, and Joey's was done in blues and greens with thick carpet and a sliding glass door that opened onto the beach.  There was also a spacious kitchen, a sunny living room with huge windows overlooking the ocean and a study where Dawson composed his screenplays. 

Pieces of Joey's artwork were scattered about the house.  A poster of Dawson's movie hung in the study and the sketch that Joey had given Dawson years ago was on his bedside table.  There was a framed picture of Jack playing football in college and a picture of Andie's receiving her degree.  Everywhere you looked were pictures of the gang in college, high school, get-togethers, etc. and on the wall above the fireplace was a large picture of the fourteen of them in front of Joey's wall the day of the dedication. 

After everything had been put away Dawson took Jen and Joey out to eat.  Afterwards they went back home to lounge on Dawson's comfy couch, sip ice tea and catch up.  Dawson and Joey both noticed that Jen looked like she wanted to tell them something.

Finally Joey cleared her throat.  "Jen, would you just tell us what the hell is going on with you?  Why are you…" Joey trailed off, searching for the best word to describe Jen's appearance.  "Glowing?"

Jen grinned.  "Okay," she paused for a moment.  "I just found out that I'm two months pregnant!"

Dawson's mouth dropped open and Joey squealed with delight, reaching over Dawson to give Jen a big hug.  "OH MY GOD!  THAT'S FANTASTIC!"

"Yeah," Jen said, smiling and hugging Joey back.

"Wow," Dawson finally said.  "That's wonderful Jen.  Congratulations."

"Thank you."

"YOU WEASEL!  Why didn't you tell me sooner," Joey demanded.

"I just found out yesterday," Jen protested.  "So, I figured I would wait and tell two of my closest friends at the same time."

"When is it due?"

"Mid-July."

"That's about the same time as the reunion," Dawson mused.

"Yep.  I’m gonna be as big as a house."

Joey had gone silent, staring at the fire.

"Jo," Dawson asked cautiously.  "You okay?"

"Yeah," Joey said, giving them both a weak smile.

Jen gave Joey a knowing look.  "Hey Joey.  Why don't you tell Dawson about the guy you met?"

Joey stared at her.

"What guy," Dawson asked, his eyebrows rising in confusion.  "You never mentioned any guy in your letters or calls."

Joey sighed.  "Well, I just met him a week ago."

"And," Dawson prodded, wanting the details.

"He looked like a grownup version of Pacey."

Dawson stared at Joey for a moment, shocked.  Then he turned to look at Jen who nodded in affirmation. 

"I know that he isn't Pacey but-but there's something about him…."

"Wow Jo."

"Yeah.  Anyway, he's a songwriter and-"

"Oh!  I know who you're talking about," Dawson cut in.  "I've never met him but Carianne used to go on and on about him."

Jen laughed.  "And how is the former 'Mrs. Dawson Leery'?"

"Married to a WWF wrestler," Dawson quipped.

This got all three of them laughing.  Dawson put an arm around Joey's shoulders.  "So…are you seeing each other?"

Joey shook her head.  "No."

"Why not?"

"Well, he didn't exactly ask me for my phone number Dawson," Joey retorted.

"Whoa Jo," Dawson said, holding up his free hand in a warding off gesture.  "Just calm down.  All I'm saying is that the only relationship you've had in the last ten and a half years was with Philip."

"We were never serious," Joey stated.

"Joey," Jen reasoned.  "He would have married you and you know it!"

Joey rolled her eyes and got up off the couch.  "GUYS!  Could we not go there?"

"Sorry Jo," Dawson said softly.  "But Jen's right.

Joey sighed.  "I know that but-but I just didn't feel that thing with him."

"What thing?"

"The passion that I felt with Pacey."

"Oh."  Dawson got quiet, contemplating her words.

"Oh god -Dawson I-" Joey began.

"No no!  It's okay," Dawson cut in.  "No offense taken.  I've been over that for a long time.  Besides, we had our own brand of passion if you remember."  Dawson wiggled his eyebrows, making Joey smile.

"Yeah.  I remember," she said, leaning against the wall.  "I don't know what it was that really got me but-I just-when I ran into him and looked into his eyes for the first time…I just felt like I was on fire.  And I haven't felt that way since Pacey," Joey admitted softly.

"Jo," Jen said gently.  "You can't spend the rest of your life hoping that Pacey will somehow reappear.  He's gone."

"Don't you think I know that," Joey choked out.  "Don't you think I realize that every morning when I wake up and he's not next to me?  That the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with is not just gone away on business or sick but that he's dead?  I'm afraid to go to sleep because, even then, I can't escape him.  I hear his voice when I'm working, walking down the street, sitting at home curled up in bed watching a movie….  It doesn't matter where I am or what I'm doing!  He's always there…haunting me."

"We know Jo," Dawson told her.

Joey shook her head.  "No.  I don't think you do."

"We all miss Pacey, Joey," Jen added.

"I know that!  But, with me, it's different."

"You need to move on Jo," Jen said.

"I know!  And I've tried.  But this guy, Pace Morgan, he's the first man I've met that I've felt that spark with."

"That's quite a resemblance," Dawson commented.

"His name and how he looks has nothing to do with this Dawson," Joey snapped.

"Sorry."

"You should call your buddy Skip and ask for Pace's number," Jen suggested.

Joey cackled.  "Jen, did you ever stop to think that maybe Pace isn't interested in me?"

"Sure.  But from what you've told me about his actions on the few occasions that you have met points to he is."

"What am I missing here," Dawson asked, confused.

"He turned up at Joey's art show and wouldn't let her walk home by herself," Jen supplied.

"Sounds like he cares," Dawson agreed.

"He was just being a concerned citizen," Joey protested, half-wanting to believe that Pace might be interested in her.

"Well, you'll never know unless you call him," Jen pointed out.

Joey threw her hands up.  "Okay!  I'll think about it!"

"Great," Jen said, smiling.

"That's all we ask," Dawson added.

Joey went back over to the couch and plopped onto the end. 

"Besides," Jen added, an evil smirk on her face.  "We wouldn't want you to die a virgin.  Sex's to great to miss out on."

Joey's eyes widened and she glared at Jen.

Dawson's mouth fell open.  "Jo, you're still a virgin," he asked, astonished.  "Phillip and you didn't-"

"Jen, I'm going to kill you," Joey muttered.

Jen tried not to laugh but couldn't help it. 

Joey picked up one of the throw pillows on the couch and hit Jen in the face with it.  "Whore!"

Jen was so stunned that she stopped mid-laugh.  Then she grinned and grabbed the cousin behind her and bopped Joey on the head.  "Bitch!"

Dawson reached over and took the pillow that his feet were propped up on and whapped each girl in the face.  "DELINQUIENTS!" 

Joey and Jen hit him simultaneously from both sides.

"Cad," Joey proclaimed, trying not to laugh.

"Viagra taker," Jen retorted.

"All right!  That's it," Dawson yelled as they began hitting each other with pillows, yelling obscenities and giggling like twelve-year olds.  Dawson jumped to his feet and ran out of the room making chicken noises.

Jen and Joey exchanged looks.

"He's gonna die," Jen declared.

"Soo bad," Joey agreed as they jumped to their feet and ran after him.

They ran all over the house, hitting each other, laughing and yelling insults. 

"Sperm donor," Jen flung, popping Dawson in the butt with her pillow.

"Sex fiend," he retorted, hitting her in the shoulder.

"Drama queen," Joey called, hitting Jen in the back of the head as she ran past them.

"Virgin," Jen shouted, running after her.

The game continued for at least an hour before the three of them collapsed on the living room floor, exhausted.

"Man," Jen muttered, staring at the ceiling.  "I haven't had this much fun since I handcuffed Henry to the bedpost."

Dawson coughed and Joey stared at her.

"I'm kidding," Jen exclaimed, laughing at the expressions on their faces. 

"I knew that," Dawson mumbled, turning slightly red.

"Sure."  Jen slowly sat up and got to her feet.  "I'm exhausted.  See you guys in the morning."

"Night Jen," Dawson said.

"Sleep tight," Joey added.

Once Jen had gone upstairs Dawson turned to Joey.  "So, about this Pace Morgan fellow, you really think that something's there?"

Joey shrugged.  "I'm not sure but I think so." 

"Do you honestly think that this guy could be your second chance at happiness?"

Joey bit her lip.  "Maybe."

"Then you should take it," he told her, a knowing smile on his face.

Joey gave him a thankful smile.  "Thanks for the advice," she said, scooting over and giving him a hug.  "I love you Oompa Loompa".

Dawson glared at her.  "I love you too.  Now get the hell out of my sight before I decide to sell your underwear at your next exhibit."

Scores was one of the best strip joints in town and on a Friday night it was packed with influential businessmen loosening their ties and kicking back bourbon.  Skip and Pace sat at a table close to one of the runways, drinking beer and talking about nothing in particular.

"What are you doing for the holidays," Pace asked.

"Bianca's folks live in Buffalo so we're going there.  You going to Florida?"

Pace nodded.  Yeah.  I'm leaving in a few days."

"Give mom and pops a hug for me."

"I will."

A tall, red head came onto the stage wearing one of the most outrageous leather get-ups that Pace had ever seen.  She started her act, noticing him immediately.

"Man, she digs you," Skip commented, chuckling.

"It would appear that way, wouldn't it," he asked as the woman stepped off the stage and went over to their table.  She straddled Pace and sat down on his lap.

"Woohoo," Skip yelled.

Even though Pace's lap dance felt wonderful there was only one person that he wanted to give him one.  He could picture her sitting on his lap, her dark hair swinging around her face, his hands on her thighs, her breasts in his face….  Pace came back to reality.  The woman was sending him a message with her eyes that said:  "Wanna meet me later?"  Pace smiled but shook his head no, placing a fifty in her g-string and gently pushing her off him.  Incredulous, she stared at him for a moment and then turned back to her larger audience.

"So when are you going to ask me for her phone number," Skip finally asked, his eyes twinkling.

Pace looked at him.  "Whose phone number," he asked innocently.

"Cut the crap Pace.  You know who I'm talking about."

Pace just stared at him.

Skip rolled his eyes.  "You are so damn stubborn sometimes."

"Skip, I don't want her phone number," Pace lied.

"Yes you do," Skip countered.  "Pace, come on man.  This is me, Skip, your best buddy.  I know that you would have normally immensely enjoyed that lap dance."

"Bianca doesn't do lap dances," Pace joked, trying to change the subject.

Skip glared at him.  "That's not the point.  The point is that Joey is the first woman you've been really attracted to.  Don't you think you should grab what could be your chance at happiness?"

Pace sighed.  "It's complicated."

"No.  No, it's not.  It's only complicated because you want it to be."

Pace looked at his friend, trying not to let what he was feeling show on his face.

"It won't work," Skip commented.

"What," Pace asked vaguely.

"Trying to cover up the fact that you're just as lonely as she is."

Skip finally had Pace's attention.  "What do you mean?"

"Man, it's not my place to tell you.  All I can say is that Jo's been through her own hell."

Pace contemplated this for a moment, getting lost in the thoughts that swam inside his head.

Pace could see her in his bed, naked, looking gorgeous with her hair fanned over the pillows.  He could see his hands on her body, roaming her soft skin, making her whisper his name over and over….

"PACE!"

"What," he mumbled, coming out of his fantasy.

"What planet were you on," Skip asked, amused.

"Planet erotica," Pace retorted.

"Sorry man," Skip protested, staring at him in amusement.

"What?"

"Do you want her number?"

"Skip," Pace warned.

"Okay, okay.  I won't push.  I just hope that you won't let this chance pass you by."

Pace groaned and finished his beer.  "Skip, I already told you, I don't need a relationship."

Skip sighed.  "Fine.  But I think it would be a perfect match."

Pace just rolled his eyes.  "You ready?"

"Yeah," Skip said, getting up.  "Just think about what I said.  Please?"

Pace nodded.  "Yeah."

Joey silently slid the glass door closed behind her and walked out onto the sand.    It was well after midnight but, as usual, sleep evaded her.  Jen and she had been here for three days and in the morning they would be leaving.  Jen was flying back to New York and Joey was going to Capeside for Christmas for the first time in six years.  In the past, after Joey had finished school, Bessie, Bodie, Alex and their younger daughter Katherine had either come to New York to see her or they had called each other on Christmas day.  But now, Joey knew that the time had come for her to go home and stop looking for ways to get out of it.  Capeside would always remind her of Pacey and she had to get used to that fact.

Joey walked down to the edge of the water and let the waves rush over her feet.  It was a gorgeous night and the water felt cool and inviting.  This was the perfect time of night to contemplate…and the perfect place to do it.  Joey gazed out over the dark water, letting her mind wander.

Daniel "Pace" Morgan, someone that immensely resembled Pacey Witter, was the main thing on her mind.  Joey had only met him twice but had received strange vibes from him both times.  It was almost like he was afraid to do and say what he wanted to.  Why would a man of his stature be afraid of anything?  And better yet, why would he even bother with someone like her? 

Joey sighed and walked out a little further into the water.  It would be so easy to just keep walking, let herself be submerged…but she didn't want to do that anymore.  What she wanted to do was find out more about Pace Morgan.   Joey thought that he was one of the sexiest men she had ever encountered.  And what made him irresistible was the fact that he didn't seem to know it.  Was it even possible that he could be interested in her?  Or was his insistence to see her home that night simply to be a gentleman?  Joey had no idea but she was dying to find out.  She smiled as she thought about this.  Pace was not Pacey…but, nonetheless, there was something about him that called out to her.  Joey had to admit that maybe this man was who she had been looking for since she had accepted the fact that Pacey would never return.  The thought was a scary one but Joey accepted it.  As Jen had told her earlier, it was about time that Joey met someone who could spark her interest. And Pace was definitely interesting, mysterious…and unbelievably sexy. 

The only relationship that she'd had since Pacey had been with Phillip, a medical student that Joey had met at a party Jen had drug her to.  He'd been very charming and caring and Joey had believed that she could make herself love him.  Phillip would have done anything for her, Joey knew that, but she couldn't feel the passion and inexplicable love that she had experienced during her brief but unforgettable relationship with Pacey.  Joey had never told Jen, or anyone else, that Philip actually had proposed to her and Joey realized that there was no way that she could marry him.  She couldn't give him the love that he deserved.  It had broken Joey's heart to reject him as much as it had broken his but it had been the best thing to do…for the both of them.  Joey and Phillip had managed to regain their friendship, which had been great, and saw each other when he was in New York or Joey was in Boston. 

Joey was in the water up to her waist when she finally stopped.  She closed her eyes and lifted her face towards the night sky, breathing in the smell of the sea.  After Pacey's death, everyone had thought that Joey would never want to go near the ocean again, but Joey found the sea strangely soothing.  Maybe this was because Pacey had loved it so much and, as crazy as it sounded, the sea made Joey feel closer to him.  She sighed and let her mind go back to events from years before.

Joey was sitting on her dock, sketchpad on her lap, drawing the creek.  It was mid-April but the day was rather chilly and she had on a long sleeved shirt but was still cold.  Joey would have got up and went inside the house but she wanted to finish the sketch before the light faded.  She was so engrossed in her work that she didn't hear the footsteps on the wooden dock.

"Hey Potter," a voice whispered in her ear.

Joey closed her eyes against the tingling feeling in her body as Pacey sat down behind her, legs on either side of hers.  She sighed, leaning back against his chest.  "Hey Witter."

Pacey noticed that she was shivering.  "Lean up a sec Jo."

Joey did so and Pacey opened up his coat. 

"Okay."

Joey leaned back against him and he wrapped the coat around both of them.  The tingling in her body increased and she looked down to see what coat he had on.  Brown corduroy met Joey's eyes and she smiled.  She loved this coat because he looked so adorable in it…and it smelled like him.

"Warmer," he asked softly, his chin on her shoulder.

Joey nodded slightly.  "Yeah."

Pacey sighed and kissed her cheek.  "Whatcha drawin'?"

"Creek," Joey said, absently holding up the pad so that he could see it.

Pacey looked at the sketch.  "Wow.  That's really good Jo."

"No it's not.  But thank you for saying that."

Gently, Pacey tilted her chin so that he could look into her eyes.  "Jo, stop being so hard on yourself.  You have this amazing talent and it's going to take you somewhere.  One day, your art is going to be displayed in the best galleries around.  Everyone will know your name and I bet that even the president will own one of your pieces."

Joey smiled at his attempt to convince her.  "You're impossible."

Pacey nodded.  "Yeah.  So are you."

Joey leaned in and kissed him softly.  She had found that ever since the night by the fire at Aunt Gwen's that she rather liked initiating kisses with Pacey.  One kiss turned into several until Joey finally remembered her sketch and pulled away.  "Gotta finish this," she said, not really wanting to stop kissing him.

Pace smirked.  "Go ahead.  I'm content to sit right here."

Joey grinned.  "Uh-huh.  Something tells me that I'm gonna have to go hunt for some Chex Mix."

Pacey laughed.  "Nah.  I've got something better than Chex Mix sitting right here with me."

Joey stared at him for a moment, getting lost in his eyes.

"Jo, your sketch," he reminded her, amused.

"Right," she said sheepishly, turning her attention to her drawing.  Five minutes passed before she put down her pencil and held up the drawing.  "Finished," she announced.

Pacey nodded.  "It looks wonderful Jo.  I meant what I said.  You're going to make something out of yourself.  Just don't listen to anyone that tries to tell you otherwise."

Joey gazed at him for a moment with something shining in her eyes that Pacey couldn't quite read.  The she smiled warmly.  "Thank you Pacey."

"It's the truth," he said simply.

"I just wish that I could go somewhere different, you know?  Where there was something new to see and paint."

Pacey nodded thoughtfully, a plan forming in his head.  "Yeah."

Joey ran her hands up his arms, loving how they felt around her, and wound her hands around the back of his neck. 

"So…tomorrow's Friday," Pacey began

"Yeah.  TGIF!"

Pacey chuckled.  "Then Saturday.  The big day."

"The boat christening."

"Yeah."

"She's a beauty Pacey."

"Thanks."

"Looking forward to it?"

"Yeah, if I get to have a make-out session with you before hand.  Give me the energy to bust the bottle," he joked.

Joey rolled her eyes and kissed his neck.  "You are such a jerk," she said, laughing. 

"Tomboy," he shot back.

"Pervert," was her heated response, unwinding her hands and sitting up to glare at him.

Pacey laughed.  "Overachiever."

"Moron!"

"Tease!"

Joey slapped his arm, pretending to be offended.  "Cretin!"

Pacey grabbed her hands, chuckling.  "Chicken!"

"OH YEAH," she yelled, trying to break free of his grip, laughing.

"YEAH!"

Joey stopped wiggling and planted a big wet one on his lips, taking Pacey by surprise, who wrapped his arms around her.  She pushed him back, hard and he bumped his head on the dock.

"Oww," he mumbled against her lips.

"Sorry," she said, running her hands through his hair.  "Wait-no I'm not."

Pacey growled, kissing her deeply, his hands tangling in the dark mass of hair on her head.

They heard the sound of a truck motor in the distance and broke apart hastily.  Pacey got up and helped Joey to her feet.  He smirked at her disheveled appearance. 

"What are you smiling at," she demanded, giving him an icy glare.

"You."

"Do I have lead on my face…what?"

Pacey reached over and unclipped her hair and ran his hands through it, trying to comb it out.  "There.  Your hair looked really messy."

Joey gulped.  "Thanks."

"Sure.  We don't want Bessie thinking that you went for a roll in the hay."

Joey rolled her eyes.  "In your dreams, porno boy."

Pacey laughed.  "Yeah.  I guess so."

Joey stared at him. 

"Well, technically, we did roll," he said, winking at her mischievously. 

Joey smacked him in the chest.  "Asshole."

Pacey laughed and pulled her in for a quick kiss.  "Gotta go," he said, moving away from her and the temptation to grab her hand and run off into the night.

"Yeah," she agreed.  "I'll see you tomorrow Pacey."

"Yeah," he said giving her a secretive smile.  "You will."

Joey smiled at the memory.  The next day Pacey had shown up on her doorstep bright and early and convinced her to skip school with him and go to the retreat off Highway 20.  Joey still thought of that day as one of the best days of her life. 

Sighing, Joey trudged out of the water and up the beach to the house.  She quickly rinsed off her feet and slipped back inside her room.  She took a well-worn picture out of her suitcase and curled up under the covers with it, gazing at it, until she eventually fell asleep.

Pace Morgan stopped his car in front of his parents beach house.  He quickly got out and made his way up the walkway to the front door.  Before Pace could even ring the bell, the door swung open and Kristina launched herself on him, hugging him tightly.

"Pace!  I'm so glad you made it," she exclaimed.

"Hey Kris," he said, chuckling as he returned her enthusiastic hug.

Kristina released Pace and grabbed his hand, leading him inside. 

"Daniel," a female voice called.  "Is that you?"

His parents were the only ones that still called him by his first name.  "Hey ma," Pace said as Sharon wrapped him up in a hug and gave him a peck on the cheek. 

"It's so good to see you," she told him, stepping back to take a good look at him.  "You look tired."

"I am tired," he said simply.

"Well, we'll make sure that you get plenty of rest, won't we Kristina?"

"We sure will Mom."

The two youngsters followed Sharon into the kitchen where she was preparing some wonderful smelling pasta.  Pace looked around, searching for Thomas.  "Your father is in his study," she told Pace.

"Thanks," Pace said, walking back out of the kitchen, quickly striding past the open doors that led to the beach and knocking on the door to his father's study.

"Come in," was the gruff reply.

Pace opened the door and chuckled at the site that greeted him.  Thomas Morgan was scowling at his golf ball that wouldn't go into the hole. 

"Hey pop," Pace said, smiling.

Thomas looked up from his game.  "Daniel!  When did you get in?"

"Just now."

Thomas walked over to Pace and gave him a fatherly hug. 

"When did you get indoor golf," Pace asked, amused.

"A few months ago.  Your mother used to bitch at me for not getting enough exercise.  So, I bought this baby and now she bitches at me for never doing anything else."

Pace laughed, imaging Sharon stalking into the study with her hands on her hips telling Thomas to exercise.  "You two are something else."

"Don't we know it," Mr. Morgan agreed, casing his putter.  "Let's eat."

"Ouch," Kristina yelped, playfully shoving Pace as they unloaded his car after supper.

"You started it," Pace quipped, grabbing his carryon bag and a box filled with presents.

"So, what did you get Mom and Dad for Christmas?"

"Well, I got mom this huge collection of contemporary songs for her to play on the piano from a great little music shop close to the studio."

"She'll love it," Kristina said as she grabbed Pace's guitar from the backseat and they trudged back up the walkway.  "And dad?"

"I got him a set of binoculars.  He said that his others got broken when Aunt Maria accidentally sat on them so…I figured I'd get him some more so he could go back to snooping."

Kristina laughed.  "Yep.  He loves to spy on people.  I wonder why."

"He was a well-known businessman with political ties Kris.  They all like to snoop."

Kristina rolled her eyes.  "You and that smart mouth of yours."

Pace laughed.  "Very funny.  Like you have any room to talk."

"Never said I did," Kristina shot back, going up the steps.  "What about me?"

"What about you?"

Kristina glared at him.  "What did you get me?"

"Oh…you know, the usual gift that Santa brings to all the bad little girls.  A bag of switches and a lump of coal."

Kristina frowned and stuck her tongue out at him as they went through the front door.

Pace chuckled.  "Nice try.  Ain't happening."

After Christmas Eve dinner, the Morgan's followed family tradition by gathering around the piano to sing some holiday tunes.  Sharon played the piano while Pace strummed along on his guitar, singing for at least an hour before sitting down in front of the tree to open up one present apiece.  Sharon chose one of the gifts from Pace and opened the songbook.  She gave him a huge hug then went over to the piano to play through some songs.  Pace picked one from his parents that was a personalized set of stationary for his songs.  He gave each of them a peck on the cheek. 

"Thanks guys," he said, liking how the stationary had silver music notes on it. 

"We knew you'd like it."

Kristina opened one from her parents and shrieked in delight when she held up tickets to see a revival of The Phantom of the Opera.  "Thank you!" 

Pace, Thomas and Sharon chuckled.

Mr. Morgan opened up a "Dummies Guide to Golfing" from Kristina and immediately went to his study to pour over it earning a disapproving glare from Sharon.  He leaned down and planted a kiss on her forehead as he went by.  "You know I love you more."

Sharon poked out her lip.  "Sure doesn't seem like it," she joked.  "Go, go play with your balls."

Pace and Kristina snorted laughter as the two elders looked at them.  Finally, it dawned on them.  Sharon turned red while Thomas coughed. 

"I meant the golf balls," Sharon explained.

"We know that mom," Kristina said, laughing.  "It just sounded funny."

"I'm getting out of here," Thomas mumbled, going to his study.

"I'm going back to sorting through my book," Sharon added, turning her attention back to her music.

Pace and Kristina sat on the couch, grinning.

"So, how's Skip," Kristina finally asked, after they had calmed down.

"He's doing real good.  He's dating an attorney."

Kristina coughed.  "I bet that's an interesting sight."

"Well, I wouldn't know.  I haven't met her yet."

"Oh."

"Yeah.  She's been really busy on a case of some sort.  But, we've set up dinner for a few weeks from now."

"Cool."

"Oh come on Kris!  I know you have a crush on him!"

"Had," Kristina corrected him.  "Had a crush on him Pace."

Pace smirked.  "Sure."

"Pace!  I was like twelve years old!"

"Uh huh."

"ARGH!"  Kristina threw up her hands.  "Changing the subject.  Have you met anyone?"

Pace's thoughts immediately went to Joey but decided not to say anything.  "No."

Kristina saw right through it.  "Yeah right.  Spill."

Pace sighed and looked at the wall.  "I ran into this woman a few weeks ago.  I don't know what it was.  But, there was something about her, she just captivated me."

"Go on."

"This girl was gorgeous, Kris.  I can't describe her in any other way.  We apologized and left but I didn't forget about her."

"What?  You didn't get her phone number," Kristina exclaimed.

"Why does everyone say that," Pace asked, annoyed.  "No lame-o.  I didn't.  But I met her again at an art exhibit.  Turns out that she's a very well respected and talented artist.  I didn't even know she was the artist until Skip told me.  I bought one of her sculptures."

"And?"

"Well, we talked for at least thirty minutes.  She's very nice…very intriguing."

"So…did you get her number?"

"No."

"PACE!"

"Hold up," Pace exclaimed, raising his hands in protest.  "After the show, I saw her again and offered to see her home.  We had a friendly argument and I yelled something that I have no idea where it came from."

"You think it was a memory," Kristina asked, wide-eyed.

Pace shrugged.  "I don't know.  Anyway, I think it startled her and she agreed to let me take her home.  So we shared a cab together."

"Did you get her number," Kristina asked for the third time.

Pace rolled his eyes.  "No!  But, I do know what building she lives in."

Kristina sighed.  "Whoopee."

"Kris," Pace said, irked.  "I'm not finished."

"Oh.  Sorry."

"It also turns out that Skip knows her."

"That's great," Kristina exclaimed.  "Did he give you her number?"

"He's offered to several times."

Kristina's eyes widened.  "You didn't take it?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because, Kris, you know why."

Kristina sighed and shook her head ruefully.  "Pace, you have to stop being so afraid of people."

"I'm not afraid of people," Pace retorted.

"Well, you certainly seem to be afraid of women," Kris stated, propping her feet up on the coffee table.

Pace rolled his eyes.  "Kris, it's not that.  You know why I don't let a lot of people in."

"No, I don't."  She turned to look her brother in the eyes.  "Pace, you are a wonderful person.  Anyone would be lucky to have you in his or her life.  Especially a woman."

Pace gave her a small smile.  "Thanks for saying that."

"I mean it."

"I know you do Kris.  I just-I just don't think that I could ever be good for anyone.  I mean, the only real relationship I've had was with Vicki in college and that definitely didn't turn out so well."

"Yeah, well, that's life for you.  Things happen, you screw up, but you don't stop trying."

Pace sighed and put an arm around his sister.  "Kris, I know that you're trying to help but please, drop this."

Kristina bit her lip.  "Okay.  But please, Pace, just think about it.  This woman could be what you've been looking for."

Pace nodded thoughtfully.  "I'll think about it Kris."

The snow was really coming down when Joey pulled up in front of the Potter B&B.  Bessie had really grown to love running a bed and breakfast and it had gained quite a reputation for its friendly staff and warm atmosphere.  Many thanks to Fred Fricke, Joey thought as she climbed out of her rental car and grabbed her bag from the backseat.  Guests were here practically every day, especially after people learned that Dawson Leery had grown up across the creek and the Joey Potter had once lived here and that her sister still ran it.  Bessie had been ecstatic when Joey had called to say that she was coming for Christmas and had closed it down for the week.  Joey reached the familiar front porch, took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

Bessie answered on the first ring, flinging her arms around her younger sister.  "HEY!"

Joey smiled as she returned Bessie's hug.  "Hi Bess.  How are you?"

Bessie pulled back and grinned.  "Great."

"AUNTIE JOEY," a little voice exclaimed.  A little girl with dark hair clumsily ran up to them and flung her tiny arms around Joey's legs. 

Joey laughed and picked up six-year-old Katherine.  "Hey sweetie.  How's my favorite niece?"

"Growing like a weed," Bessie said, smiling wistfully.

"Great," Katherine replied.

They had entered the kitchen and Joey placed Katherine back on her feet.  She scampered off to find her daddy, Bodie, who was tinkering with some Christmas lights.  Bessie and Bodie had finally gotten married about a month before Katherine was conceived. 

"Hey Bodie," Joey called, grinning at the image of Bodie tangled up in multi-colored lights.

"Hiya Jo," Bodie yelled back.  "How was your trip?"

"Long."

"How's Dawson," Bessie asked, handing her sister a cup of hot chocolate.

"Same as ever.  Still looking for his Kate Capshaw." 

Bessie laughed.  "I bet.  And Jen?"

Joey grinned.  "She's expecting."

Bessie dropped the dishrag that was in her hand and squealed with delight.  "Oh Jo!  That's great!"

"Yeah."

"Does she want a boy or a girl?"

"Jen said it didn't matter."

"What does Henry think?"

Joey rolled her eyes.  "Henry's a pediatrician.  He loves kids and he's always wanted one of his own."

"Yeah."  Bessie paused and looked at Joey closely.

"Just ask me," Joey said, irritated.

"Okay.  Have you met anyone?"

"Anyone who," Joey asked, stalling.

"Anyone that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with…have kids with?"

Joey groaned.  "Bessie!"

"Sorry, sorry.  A sister can hope, can't she?"

Joey sighed, debating on whether or not to tell Bessie about Pace. 

"What is it," Bessie asked.

"I did meet someone."

Bessie's eyes widened.  "Great.  Spill."

"Well, he gave me quite a shock Bessie," Joey began.

"What do you mean," Bessie asked, crinkling her nose in confusion.

"I was walking down the street, on my way to meet Jen, lost in thought when I ran into this man.  This incredibly attractive man…."

Bessie grinned.  "Jo!  Come on.  Tell me."

Joey looked Bessie in the eyes.  "I looked up at him and Bessie, I swear, I thought that Pacey had come back from the dead."

Bessie's eyes widened.  "Oh wow."

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry Jo," Bessie said sympathetically.

"No!  Don't be.  It was actually a nice experience."

"So, did you get his number?"

Joey sighed, exasperated.  "No."

"Joey!  Why not?"

"Well, because I was in shock!  Besides, I don't even know if he's interested in me."

"Sounds like you ran into him again," Bessie commented.

"I did," Joey admitted. 

Bessie clapped her hands together gleefully.  "So…what happened?"

"He bought one of my pieces."

"Well, that's good right?"

"Yeah.  We talked for a while and then he wanted to see me home.  So, being the stubborn girl I am said no thanks.  He chased me, we bickered, oddly reminiscent of when Pacey and I used to, and he yelled something at me that Pacey had said to me once"

Bessie stared at her sister, shocked.  "Whoa."

"Yeah.  Anyway, it startled me.  I could tell that he felt bad about it so I let him take me home."

"Sounds like a gentleman."

"That's what I think too.  I mean, he was just being a nice guy, right?"

"Maybe," Bessie mused.  "But, most guys in New York probably wouldn't have bothered, especially if they didn't know you."

"You think," Joey asked hopefully.

Bessie nodded.  "Yeah.  So, did he ask you for your number?"

"No."

"Did you ask for his?"

"No."

"JOEY!"

"Sorry.  I just, I don't know.  I don't want him to think I'm some sort of maniac."

"Not possible.  Just your family thinks that," Bessie joked.

Joey glared at her.  "Ha ha.  Very funny Bessie.  Seriously, I thought about it, but I don't know.  I could get his number from Skip, my friend I told you of, because he knows him."

"Now there's an idea," Bessie agreed.

"But, I'm not sure if it's the right thing to do."

"Jo, you can't spend the rest of your life alone."

"I know that Bessie," Joey snapped.

Bessie looked hurt and Joey softened.  "Sorry.  I just don't know what to do.  I mean, this man is the first guy that I've felt this undeniable attraction to."

"Like you did with Pacey," Bessie said knowingly.

"Yeah.  Anyway, the big kicker is that he's a well-known songwriter and he has a name almost like Pacey."

Bessie's eyes flickered with recognition.  "Oh, wait a minute.  I remember Andie telling me something about a songwriter named "Pace" or something like that."

"That would be him."

Bessie shook her head.  "Damn!  Andie showed me a picture.  He's a very handsome man."

"I heard that," Bodie called from behind the tree.

Bessie smiled.  "You know I love you Bodie."

"I know.  I love you too."

"Yeah.  You can't talk about other men.  You're married now," Joey agreed, winking in Bodie's direction. 

Bessie glared at Joey.  "Since when does that mean that I can't look and gossip?"

Joey laughed. 

Bessie's face took on a serious expression again.  "Seriously Jo.  Maybe you should think about calling him.  You could be missing out on a good thing here."

Joey nodded.  "I know.  I'm just scared."

"That's normal."

They were interrupted by the sound of the front door closing and twelve-year-old Alexander bounded into the kitchen. 

"Aunt Jo," he exclaimed, giving her a big hug.  "You made it."

"Alex.  My favorite nephew."

"Your only nephew," he corrected.

Joey smiled.  "Of course, but you're still my favorite."

"How's everything," he asked, taking a mug of hot chocolate from his mother.

"Good.  It's nice to be back."

"It's good to have you back.  It's been a long time."

"Yeah.  But I still got to see everyone."

"I know.  But it's nice for you to be here for the first time in a while."

"Yeah.  I know what you mean," Joey agreed, smiling at her nephew.

Bessie put an arm around her sister.  "Welcome home Jo."

Joey grinned.  "Thanks Bessie."

Pace sat on the couch, staring out the glass doors that led down to the beach…and the sea.  Last night, sitting here after Kristina had gone to bed, he'd decided to return to New York as soon as possible, much to his parents and sister's dismay.  His excuse had been that he had to finish helping Dan at the studio but the truth was that he needed some time alone to think.  Pace needed to sort out all the alien feelings that had gripped him since meeting Joey.  His emotions were in overdrive and it was the holidays that really made Pace realize just how lonely he was, how much he wanted someone to cuddle up by the fire with...and how it might never happen.

Pace had spent countless hours trying to figure out what it was that made him so afraid.  And why was he afraid of the ocean?  Was there some psychological connection that he hadn't been able to uncover yet?  Questions that he had stopped asking years ago suddenly demanded answers again.  Memories that remained hidden pounded upon his brain, begging to be seen.  It was driving him crazy.  She was driving him crazy.  Pace got up and went over to the doors, slowly opening one and letting the salty air rush in.  He took a deep breath and stepped out onto the deck, closing the door behind him.  Gingerly, he stepped onto the sand, wincing as the gritty matter sank between his toes.  Pace forced himself to continue, slowly moving one foot at a time.  The sound of the waves got louder and he could vaguely see them crashing to the shore.  Pace froze.  Come on dammit, he insisted.  Stop being such a scaredy cat.  It's just water.  Regardless of that fact, he couldn't make his feet move any farther.  Emotionally spent, overcome with a surge of emotions that he had no control of, Pace turned around and ran back up the beach, bounding up the deck steps to the house and shutting the glass door tightly behind him.  Exhausted, he pressed his forehead against the cool glass and tried to regain his composure. 

Once Pace had managed to do this, he quietly went to his room, closing the door behind him.  He went to his nightstand and took out his notebook with the lyrics to the song he had been working on and sank to the bed.  Thumbing through the pages, he finally found a blank one.  Picking up his pen, Pace let all his emotions flow onto the paper.

Darkness surrounds me
Memories that I can't see
I'm desperately searching for the future
But only finding eternal torture

Joey sat on the familiar bench, gazing up at the wall, staring at Pacey's reconstructed face.  She had gone for a walk around the town, not really having any destination in mind and found herself sitting here at precisely ten-thirty on Christmas day, ten years since the last Christmas that he had been alive, reliving the night that they had given each other leather-bound journals.  "God Pacey," she whispered.  "I miss you."

"I know what you mean," a voice said behind her.

Joey turned around, startled.  "Doug!"

"Hey Joey," Doug said, sitting down next to her on the wooden bench.  "How are you?"

"Holding my own.  And you?"

"Doing the same.  How's the art world?"

"Extremely demanding," Joey admitted.  "It's rather nice to be able to come home and enjoy some peace and quiet."

"I imagine."  Doug looked up at the wall.  "I come here a lot you know."

"Really?"

"Yeah.  It's kind of like my sanctuary."

Joey smiled.  "I know what you mean."

"Every once in a while I swear that I can hear Pacey coming into the apartment, yelling at me to kill the divas."

Joey laughed softly.  "Yeah.  Sometimes I swear that I hear someone calling me 'Potter'."

"I haven't seen you in a long while.  I figured you haven't been back because of the memories."

"Yeah," Joey admitted, tears stinging her eyes.  "Everywhere I look are memories, especially here.  I remember when he first showed me the wall, trying to figure out what to paint on it, him asking me if I could ever love him like a soul mate, painting the wall for him…remembering him."  Joey felt the tears falling down her cheeks and cursed herself for her weakness. 

Doug reached over and wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulders.  "I know Joey.  It's okay.  You can cry.  I promise I won't tell…as long as you promise not to tell on me."

Joey nodded.  "Okay."

Sometime later they finally composed themselves.  Joey pulled away and wiped at her eyes.  "Thanks Doug.  I needed that."

"So did I," he said, rubbing his own red eyes.

"So, how's the family," Joey asked, changing the subject.

            "The girls are at school or married with families of their own.  And dad, well, he's retired now.  He spends a lot of time out on the ocean, claming to be fishing but I think that he's been blaming himself for a lot of things."

"Oh god.  Doug, I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault Joey.  Dad just has a lot of his own inner demons to sort through."

Joey nodded thoughtfully.  "Doug, I need to ask your advice on something."

"Shoot."

Joey took a deep breath.  "I met someone that both looked and quasi-acted like Pacey."

Doug's eyes widened in shock.  "Wow.  Okay."

"I asked myself if I was only attracted to him because of that fact and I really don't think that I am."

"Yeah?"

"Yes.  So, my question is, should I go for it?"

"Joey, if this is the only guy that you've really felt like you could care about or maybe even love, of course I think that you should go for it.  It might be your only chance to find happiness and you should never pass that up."

Joey nodded, contemplating all the advice that she'd been given.  "That's what Bessie, Dawson and Jen said too."

Doug pretended to be hurt.  "So, you just asked my opinion at the last minute?"

"Sorry," she said, grinning sheepishly.

"No apology necessary Joey.  You and I have been through a lot together.  I feel privileged that you would even think to ask for my advice."

Joey leaned over and kissed his cheek gently.  "Thanks."

"Thank you."

Joey got to her feet and stretched.  "Feel like driving a lady home," she asked.

Doug grinned.  "Since when did you become a lady?"

Joey glared at him.

Doug laughed.  "Certainly not now," he joked as they walked over to where his vehicle was parked.  "Come on.  Let's get you home before Bessie starts worrying."

Home sweet home Pace thought as he unlocked the door to his apartment, letting Chocolate Chip run ahead of him.  He'd picked the dog up at a twenty-four hour kennel on the way to the apartment.  C.C. immediately went to Pace's bedroom and hoped onto the bed, going to sleep.

"Don't I wish I could do that," Pace muttered, dropping his suitcase inside his room and going to the kitchen for a beer.  He uncapped it and went to sit on his sofa, thankful for the welcoming view.  It was past midnight but Pace was still wide-awake.  He pushed the "play" button on his answering machine and listened to the messages.  One from Skip wishing him a merry Christmas, one from Dan telling him that the tracks were great, one from Winston, one of his favorite singers inquiring about when he was going to have a new song, and one hang-up.  Sighing, Pace leaned back on the couch, his thoughts drifting to what Kristina had told him a few nights before.  Then he thought about her…Joey.  She would not leave him alone.  His heart screamed at him to call Skip and get her number while his mind yelled at him that he would just get hurt and that he could never let her know his secrets. 

You can't let her in his mind hissed.

Yes you can his heart responded.

Don't listen to what that blood-pumping machine says

Well I could stop pumping.  That would shut you up.

Don't even think about it Pace.  It'll only lead to more heartache on your part.

You'll never know unless you try Pace.

Agitated, Pace put his hands over his ears.  He'd spent the last eight years listening to his mind and all he had gotten was a feeling of emptiness.  Maybe it was time that he listened to his heart.  Pace reached over and picked up his cordless phone before he could re-question his sanity.

What are you doing his brain yelled.  You're only going to hurt yourself.

"Shut up," Pace muttered.  Thankfully, it stopped, and he dialed the familiar number.

"This had better be Nikki Taylor calling or I'm hanging up," a groggy voice mumbled.

"Skip.  It's Pace."

Skip sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes.  "It's almost one a.m. Pace.  I just got back from Buffalo two hours ago and was hoping to get some sleep.  What the hell do you want at this time of night?"

"Actually its morning," Pace quipped, unable to stop himself.

"Pace," Skip warned.  "It's late, I'm tired and I was having a wonderful dream.  Either tell me what you want or I'm hanging up and going back to ravishing Nikki Taylor on my bathroom tiles."

Pace snorted laughter.  "Sorry I took you away from that."

"Damn right!  So, what is it?"

"I want her phone number," Pace spit out.

There was silence for a moment.  "Whose phone number?"

"Joey's!"

Skip was awake now.  "It's about damn time."

"Skip, shut up and give me the number."

"Okay, okay," Skip snapped.  "Hold on a sec."

While he was waiting for Skip to find the number, Pace got a piece of paper and a pen.

"Okay," Skip said coming back on the line.  "It's 555-0127."

Pace jotted down the number.  "Thanks man."

"You calling her now," Skip asked, curious.

"If I don't I'll loose my nerve.  Why?  Does she hate being woken up?"

"No more than anyone else.  But, not to worry, she's an insomniac like you.  She'll be awake."

"Okay.  Thanks buddy."

"Sure thing."  Skip paused.  "Hey Pace?"

"Yeah?"

"Good luck man."

"Thanks."

They hung up and Pace stared at the number on the paper.  Better do it while you've still got the balls he muttered to himself, dialing the number.

Joey had just shut the door to her apartment when the phone rang.  She dropped her bags and ran over to the desk where her cordless was kept and picked it up. 

"Hello," she said breathlessly.

Pace paused.  She sounded busy.

"Hello," she repeated.

"Joey?"

"Yes."

"H-Hi.  This is Pace Morgan.  We met at-"

"At the gallery and on the street corner, yes.  How'd you get my number?"

"Skip," Pace admitted sheepishly.

"Okay," Joey said.  "What can I do for you?"

"I didn't wake you did I?"

"God no.  I just got in from my sister's."

"Oh."

"So," she repeated.  "What can I do for you?"

"Well, actually I was hoping that maybe you'd like to have lunch…or dinner sometime."

Joey felt a smile tug at the corners of her mouth.

Pace felt the silence stretching.  I knew this was a bad idea he thought dejectedly.

"I'd love to," she finally said.

Pace let out a huge sigh of relief.  "Great.  So, when would be best for you?"

"Umm, how about next Friday?"

"Sure.  Sounds great.  I'll call you later and we can decide where we're going."

"Sounds great."

"Okay.  Well, I'll let you go then."

"Alright.  Looking forward to it."

"Me too.  Goodnight Joey."

"Goodnight Pace."

They hung up.

Joey plopped onto her couch, not believing her luck.  Pace had actually called her!  On the drive home, she had decided to throw caution to the wind and call Skip to get Pace's number but it seemed that he had beaten her to it.  Maybe he was interested after all….

Joey reached down and drug her bag over to the couch.  Reaching inside, she pulled out her journal and opened it up to the first blank page.
 

December 28, 2010

I've decided to start writing regularly again.  So much has happened in the last few weeks and something is really urging me to continue jotting things down.  A twenty-eight-year-old that keeps a journal is very sad. 

I went home for the holidays to see Bessie and Co.  Alex and Katherine have gotten so big! I went for a walk through Capeside and ended up at the wall, which still looks beautiful.  It's been well taken care of.  Doug showed up and we had a good little cry fest.  I actually missed him.  Can you believe that?  Joey Potter missing both Witter boys?  It's too strange to even bother clarifying.

But, first and foremost on my mind is Pace Morgan, the man I wrote about earlier.  I couldn't get him out of my head so I asked my friends for advice and they all said that I should go for it.  Or, as was once stated in the movie Never Been Kissed, I should "grab a bull by the balls".  I had decided to do just that and when I got home a few moments ago I got quite a surprise.  He called me!  He called Skip and got my number before I could call and get his. Anyway, he asked me out to lunch/dinner.  It doesn't matter which one.  I can't help but be ecstatic because I truly feel that I might have found someone that can make me whole again.  And, I think that if Pacey is watching over me, that he would approve.
 

In his own apartment, Pace Morgan sat on his couch, gazing out at the city before him, thinking about what he had just done.  He didn't regret it but he sure was scared about what could happen.  Would Joey spend one hour with him and decide that she didn't like him?  Would he decide that she wasn't what he thought she was?  Would she know that he was hiding something?  The questions plagued Pace but no answers presented themselves.