“Hey Potter. You ready to chauffeur me to school in the style and elegance I’ve become accustomed to?”
Joey ran her fingers through her hair, agitation plain on her face. “I’m not sure Pacey. Do you think this will be the new fashion rage?”

She threw the door open. Pacey pressed his lips together quickly to keep from laughing at the sight. Her clothes were covered in a tan lumpy substance and milk dripped from her sleeve. “Explosion at the oatmeal factory?”

“Alexander has taken an apparent dislike to any food with the consistency of cement and the adhesive quality of super glue.” She headed for the kitchen, mentally dubbing it a disaster area. “So, while Bessie gets the job of cleaning him up, I get the kitchen detail.”

He took the sponge from her hand as she picked it up. “Why don’t I do this? You go change and we should make it to school in time.”

Joey bit her lower lip and looked at him for a moment. “You actually *want* to go to school? What have you done with the real Pacey Witter?”

“Joey, go get changed. You’re the one who’s looking for a scholarship, I’m only looking out for you.”

She nodded and relinquished the sponge, starting off toward her room. Conscious of the newfound level of involvement between them, she glanced back and smiled, pleased to find him watching. “Looking out for me, huh? I kind of like the sound of that.”

I watch her walk away, my heart in my throat. Something in her eyes as she said that gave me a little bit of hope where we’re concerned. We haven’t talked since that morning after I dropped her off, and, while I’ve been hoping like hell that she’s going to come to the conclusion I want, I don’t want to push her.

I love her. I can admit that. And I want her to love me too. I just don’t know that she can get past all the expectations of Dawson, all the hopes and dreams of sexual bliss she has pinned on him, and see the reality of me.

I wipe up the oatmeal quickly, trying to get rid of it before it settles into a congealed mass. Finishing up, I rinse out the sponge and set it on the edge of the sink. Joey’s still not out and it’s getting to the point of ignoring every single speed limit and light in Capeside if we plan to make it to school on time.

I walk down the hall and I can’t help thinking of the other night. I’ve really thought of nothing since. She was so receptive, so willing in my arms. The fact that she gave herself over to my touch has kept me on the perpetual edge of a hard-on the entire weekend. And while I know we didn’t really do anything too…drastic, too irreversible, I know that I want that from her. I want to give that to her.

I don’t want Dawson Leery to be her first lover. I don’t want him to fumble his way around until he finds what makes him happy. I want Joey to have the very best experience a person can have. I want her first time to be like mine was. I want to give her the confidence and time that Tamara gave me.

Stepping up to her door, I think about Dawson. He’s my best friend and, for all intents and purposes, I’m moving in on his girl. The girl across the creek isn’t supposed to belong to the sidekick. But every time I try and feel guilty and think that I should just step aside, I hear her calling out my name hoarsely as she was overtaken by, what I suspect, was her first real orgasm.

An orgasm I gave her.

I raise my hand to knock and accidentally push the door open just slightly. Her back is to me and she’s staring at herself in the mirror. She’s changed her pants, dressed now in another pair of jeans, but she hasn’t quite gotten around to anything else. She’s standing there in nothing but a tight fitting pair of faded denims and…well, that’s it.

If I could actually look away from her, I might see the damp clothes on her floor or her bed, but instead I just stare at the perfection of her body, her pert breasts, the rosy nipples on her tanned skin. Her hands are resting on her stomach just above her belt and she’s slowly moving them up to cup her breasts.

I want to breathe. I really, really do.

Tilting her head sideways, she closes her eyes and squeezes both nipples lightly. I hear her breathe my name softly, her whole body blushing as she does. Dropping her hands, she grabs for her clothes and puts them on faster than I’ve ever seen a woman dress.

I back away from the door and hope to God she didn’t see me. I can’t believe I just did what I did. I’ve gotten really good at ignoring what Joey wants and doing what makes me feel good. Well, as good as I can feel with an erection I’m not going to be able to get rid of before she comes out of her bedroom.

“Hey…Pacey.” Joey opened her door and blushed as she saw him standing there. “Sorry I took so long. I couldn’t find a clean…well, anyway…done? In the kitchen? You’re done? We should go.”

“Sure.” He nodded and walked toward the front of the B&B, tugging his shirt a little lower. Thank goodness for baggy fashion sense. “We should still make it in time if I speed a lot.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I was probably going to speed anyway. I guess I can give you the driving lesson after school rather than before?”

“Really? I thought I might be out of luck today.”

“Nah. I’ve got ya covered, baby.” He grabbed her backpack as they walked by the door and headed for the truck. Grabbing a key out of his pocket, he handed it over to her.

“What’s this?”

“If you’re going to drive it, you might as well have a key to it.” He shrugged. “Don’t mention it to my Dad, of course, but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

“Convict’s daughter and policeman’s son. What a pair, huh?”

“Well, I’d say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, but I think, in our case, they rolled into each other’s pastures.” He unlocked her door for her and then walked around to climb in himself. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as he started it, smiling when she slipped the key on her keyring. “But what’s a little grand theft auto between friends?”

“Pacey, just drive.”

He did as she asked, not talking as they sped down the road. Silence reigned until they reached the school; both relieved to see several students still milling about. “With moments to spare.”

“You’re a driving master. Although,” she looked pointedly in the direction of the police car pulling up behind them, “I don’t think Capeside’s finest agree.”

“Shit.” He stepped out of the truck and faced his brother as he got out of the police cruiser. “Hey Deputy Doug.”

“You know how fast you were going?”

“Yes.”

“And you know you were breaking the law?”

“Maybe one or two.”

“And…” the bell rang, cutting off Doug’s sentence.

Pacey glanced at Joey who was tapping her foot, wondering whether or not to leave. “Doug, you’re right and I’m wrong and I’m about to be late to school. And I’m sure a truancy or expulsion because of you would not sit well on our collective paternal’s shoulders. I gotta go.”

Doug scowled. “Go. But you’re getting a ticket.”

“And your insurance will go up with mine.” Pacey turned and grabbed Joey’s hand, racing with her toward school. “And where will your diva CD collection be then?”

I’d been nervous, waiting for him to show up this morning. Of course, Alex was nice enough to take advantage of my distraction and turn the kitchen into Quaker’s nightmare. Which, come to think of it, gave Pacey just one more chance to make me like him even more.

I can’t believe I like him. Hell, I can’t believe I love him.

I realized it this weekend. He stopped in front of my house and turned off the car. Sitting there for what seemed like forever, he finally turned to me and smiled. A slow, sexy smile. Then he’d told me that he was going to stay out of my way for the rest of the weekend.

I’d felt my chest tighten at the thought, sure that he’d just won some bet and that was the end of me, until he’d promised that he’d be on my doorstep Monday morning, whether I wanted him there or not.

I’ve never wanted a Monday so badly.

Now, running down the almost deserted hallways of Capeside High, holding his hand, I realize that things have gotten farther out of control than I ever could have imagined. I haven’t thought of Dawson in days. I don’t care that I’m going to get in trouble for being tardy to class. All I care about is the fact that his thumb is rubbing my wrist as we pull up to a stop outside of my first class.

We’re both panting and I think about him watching me, outside my bedroom. I didn’t see him until he started to back away, but I wasn’t sorry he saw what he did. The minute I saw him this morning, my whole body felt the way it had when he’d kissed me, touched me. I felt swollen and sexy and I wanted to remember the feel of him. Even though he didn’t touch me there, I can’t help but imagine what it would be like.

What it would feel like to have those gorgeous, large hands, so rough yet so gentle, rub my skin. Pinch my nipples between his fingers, rub his thumbs in soft circles on them like he’s doing right now on my wrist, making my pulse pound.

I want to pin him to the wall of lockers and kiss him until we’re too weak to stand.

I really need to get my head examined.

Pacey stared at Joey, amazed at the emotions in her eyes. It was as if he could read her thoughts, the desire like a living thing. Pressing his thumb to her pulse point, he grinned. “You should get to class. I’ll see you at lunch?”

She nodded. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry I made you late.”

Her eyes never left his, staring at him hungrily. “You’re worth it once in a while, I suppose.”

“Ah, Joey. To know me is to wound me.” He lifted her hand and replaced his thumb with his lips. “Go to class.”

“Pace?”

He lowered her hand and met her eyes again; his own widening as she moved forward and kissed him quickly, hard and fast. “See you at lunch.”

She disappeared into her classroom and Pacey stood there, staring after her for a long minute.

“Well, Mr. Witter. Why am I not surprised?”

“Principal Green,” Pacey grinned at the approaching man. “I have a feeling I was just on my way to see you.”

“I have a feeling you were too.”

Pacey fell into step with the principal and tilted his head questioningly. “What are the odds that I’m *not* going to get detention for this?”

“Not in your favor.”

“What if I told you I had a very important engagement after school that took precedence over everything else in my life?”

Principal Green just smiled and shook his head. “I’d tell you that Miss Potter really would be better off without you having any influence over her, but you’d probably disagree with me.”

“Potter? Joey?”

“And I’d mention that, as late as the two of you were, she’s quite likely to be joining you.”

Okay, so I know I’m a bad influence. I don’t do things the way the average guy does. But then, who wants to be the average guy?

I finally made it to class by second period, after spending the morning talking to Principal Green. He surprises me, more and more. I expected the usual lecture about being responsible and how my high school life was going to be a reflection on the rest of my days, but instead I got a new one.

Joey.

He talked to me about her chances at scholarships and how I’d do better to use my obvious influence over her to encourage her to stay on her chosen path as opposed to following me down the road to ruin.

It was a nice change of pace. No pun intended. And I do want the best for Joey. Hell, anyone who wants to find their way out of Capeside has my utmost respect and encouragement. But I’m not too worried about her. Joey’s going to make it, no matter what.

As long as she doesn’t find herself back in Dawson Leery’s arms.

How disloyal does that sound? I know, all’s fair in love and war, but this is my best friend I’m talking about. I’m supposed to want what’s best for him too, right? You’ll have to forgive me for being selfish here, though. Because what’s best for him is the person I want the most in this world. Hell, I’ve wanted her longer than Dawson’s been thinking about her like a girl.

Besides, I know Dawson better than almost anyone. And as talented as he is, and as much as he wants to be the next big thang in Hollywood, I’m not placing any bets as to when he leaves Capeside behind. Sure, he’ll go away to college, but unless he gets his own angst in check, he’s not going to make his way in the world any better than your average bear.

Joey deserves better.

Which doesn’t, by any stretch of the imagination, lead to me. I know that. She knows that. I would imagine even the eternally clueless Dawson knows that. But it doesn’t change how I feel, how I want to make her feel.

It just means that, once again, I have no idea what the hell I’m supposed to do.

“Pacey!” Dawson jogged up beside his best friend and fell in step with him. “What’s up? I didn’t see you in class this morning.”

“Because I was spending a meaningful morning with everyone’s favorite authority figure.” Pacey shrugged. “I was late. I went to see Principal Green. I now am the proud owner of an afternoon of detention."

“Oh.” Dawson frowned, worried slightly by Pacey’s behavior. “I thought the play was supposed to be your first step toward a new, better student.”

“Well, I tried to find one, but none of them wanted to trade places with me.” Pacey grinned. “Don’t worry Dawson, I haven’t forgotten my intentions of actually trying to pass into my senior year. I fully intend to spend the entire hour and a half studying something as heart-stoppingly exciting as math.”

Dawson rolled his eyes and stopped at his locker. “Hey, have you seen Joey this morning? I looked for her, but never saw her come in.”

“Pacey Witter, you are a dead man.” The soft growl sent chills down Pacey’s spine. Chills that had absolutely nothing to do with the spoken threat and everything to do with the unspoken promise. “I have to spend the afternoon in detention. With you.”

“Good.” Pacey turned and grinned at Joey. “I can use a tutor. I’m a little behind on some of my studies.”

Joey returned his grin then stifled it quickly. “Yeah, well I could have used the afternoon to do something constructive. And not detention related.” She turned to Dawson. “Hi.”

“Hey. Where were you on Saturday? I came by but Bessie said she didn’t know where you’d gone.”

“Oh.” Chewing on her lower lip, Joey cast a quick glance at Pacey before looking back at Dawson. “I was actually home, in my room. Bessie just didn’t know. I was exhausted.”

“Really?” Dawson’s eyebrow shot up as he looked in Pacey’s direction. “Did we have a celebration after the play that I wasn’t invited to?”

Pacey swallowed hard, wondering if this was one of Dawson’s rare moments of unwanted insight or if he was just trying to give him a hard time. “There was eating…and a little dancing. We got home late.”

“From where?” Dawson grabbed a few books and shut his locker, walking toward his next class.

“Boston.” Joey stated quickly.

Pacey nodded dumbly. “Boston. Joey and I went to Boston.”

“For dinner? Boston isn’t exactly just up the road, Pacey.”

“It is, just farther than you think. Which is why we got home late and Joey was exhausted. I was exhausted too. Slept all day.”

Dawson nodded, his brow furrowed. “Right. Okay. I’ll see you guys at lunch.”

They both waved, walking quickly toward their respective classes. Joey waited until Dawson was out of hearing range before heaving a sigh. “That was probably closer than it ever should have been.”

“No kidding.”

“We’re going to have to work on the cover story thing, I think.”

Pacey nodded quietly, not wanting to show his disappointment. If she wanted a cover story, that meant that she had no intention of letting anyone – especially Dawson – know about what was going on between them. Although it did suggest that there would be something going on between them.

Or maybe she was just talking about what had gone on between them.

“Joey…”

“Here’s my class. Bye Pace.”

“Yeah. Bye.”

He looked so sad. I know I said the wrong thing, although I don’t know exactly what I said wrong. It was just that seeing Dawson confused me. I mean, when it’s just Pacey and me? Everything makes sense. It just falls into place and doesn’t need explanation or analyzation.

But with Dawson around, I find myself picking everything apart. Pacey isn’t the right guy for me. He’s got the motivation of a slug, he doesn’t apply himself, and he’s most likely going to live in Capeside for the rest of his life, living it out in some sort of horribly mockery of the perfect family. Knowing his history, he’ll have some girl knocked up by the time he’s 20, married for the wrong reasons…and to the wrong woman.

Pacey’s good at the wrong woman.

Of course, he’s also loyal and honest. He’s caring and he’ll do anything for someone he cares for, even if he doesn’t get the recognition for it.

I mean, I know that I gave him a hard time over Miss Jacobs, but I admired the way he put himself on the line for her. He risked a lot to make sure she didn’t have to.

Not that he didn’t get anything in return.

Which brings me right back to where I started.

What did I say wrong? I mean, I just wanted to make sure that what happened between us stayed there, between us. I mean, what business is it of Dawson’s if Pacey and I are…

Oh shit.

I stare unseeing at the chalkboard, not paying attention to the teacher. I’m ahead on the assignments, so it doesn’t matter too much, but that doesn’t do much to put my mind at rest.

Pacey doesn’t just want to *be* with me. He wants to be my…boyfriend.

Oh shit.

Andie sank down onto the grass beside Joey. “Hey.”

“Hey Andie.”

“Why are you out here? I mean, I thought you’d be inside with Pacey and Dawson trying to discover the truth behind the mystery meat.”

“Nah. I’ll leave that to Mulder and Scully.”

“Which one do you think would be Scully?

Joey laughed. “I honestly couldn’t tell you.”

Andie laughed as well, casting a sideways look at Joey. “Can I ask you a question?”

“No.” Joey smiled, although she actually hoped Andie would believe her.

“It’s about Pacey.”

“Then definitely not.” Joey shook her head. “Pacey is an unfathomable mystery to me. Even more unknowable than the lunchroom concoctions.”

“Do you like him too?”

“Okay, that’s it.” Joey stood up and walked a few steps away. “When did we get so obvious? I mean, I like to pride myself on keeping my internal issues just that. Yet everyone seems to know what’s going on as if I have it emblazoned across my chest like someone out of “The Scarlet Letter.” I just want to know how my life became common knowledge.”

“It’s easy for me, Jo. I love him too.”

Joey sank back down and hugged Andie impulsively. “I’m sorry.”

“No. Don’t be. Pacey and I…we’re okay now. We helped each other when we needed it; we were good while we lasted. But he was right when he said that I…I did what I did because it…he wasn’t what I needed anymore. I need to be okay with being Andie again, before I can be a part of Andie and…well, anyone else.”

“You’re doing much better at being Andie.”

“I am. But I…well, I still want what’s best for him, you know?”

“I do.”

“And he really cares about you, Joey. He has for a long time. And not just in a ‘we’re buddies’ kind of way. And I just…well, I guess I just want to know what your intentions are. I saw you guys after the play and I know that there’s something between you.”

“I…I like him. I do.”

“But?”

“But…well, all my life, I’ve been longing for Dawson and now…liking someone else…the way I like Pacey? It’s a little unnerving.”

“What about Jack?”

“Jack wasn’t Dawson’s best friend.”

“So this is more about how Dawson’s going to react?”

“React to what?” Dawson sank down onto the grass next to Andie. “What am I reacting to?”

Joey closed her eyes, hoping the ground would swallow her up. “And why am I not involved?” Pacey sat next to Joey, his hand brushing against hers. “Unless this is some sort of kinky sexual thing you ladies have thought up, in which case…why am I not involved?”

“Dating.” Joey blurted out the word, mentally kicking herself. She let her fingers find Pacey’s out of Dawson’s sight and squeezed his hand. “I mean, we were just wondering how you would react to…me…dating.”

“You’ve been dating for a while, Jo. Perhaps you remember that we did it?” Dawson shook his head. “What is up with you? You’ve been acting like a scared cat all day. Did something happen this weekend? Did you meet someone?”

“Sort of?”

“Are you asking me or telling me, Jo?” Dawson leaned forward and tapped her on the knee. “Come on. Give up the details. Who’s the lucky guy?”

The silence was thick enough to cut. Andie’s eyes begged Joey’s forgiveness. Pacey was struggling desperately not to look in Joey’s direction, but found he couldn’t meet Dawson’s eyes either.

“Well? Come on. Do you know, Pace? You guys spent the night together, right?”

Pacey coughed and tried to catch his breath. He shook his head, pointing at his throat, gesturing that he couldn’t talk, since he was too busy dying.

“Well, Jo? C’mon. It can’t be that bad. I mean, it’s not like it’s Pacey or anything, right?” At the continued silence, realization dawned in Dawson’s eyes. He shook his head in disbelief. “No. That’s impossible.”

Pacey found his voice. “Why impossible?”

“Wh…why?” Dawson got to his feet and glared down at his best friend. “Because you would never do something like that to me. At least, I would hope, as my best friend, that you could manage to control your baser urges and actually find your own girlfriend, as opposed to horning in on mine.”

“She’s not your girlfriend.” Pacey stood as well, matching Dawson glare for glare. “You made that perfectly clear at the beginning of the school year and just because you couldn’t get your rocks off with the town skank, doesn’t mean that you can just waltz back into Joey’s life and expect her to take you back.”

“But it does mean that you can just waltz in on someone you’re supposed to be looking out for and confuse her?”

“I didn’t confuse her, Dawson. I haven’t done anything to her, unless you count treating her like a person as opposed to my own toy to play with whenever I want to.” Pacey took a step forward, his blue eyes flashing.

“You’re deluding yourself, Pacey. Look at her,” Dawson gestured toward Joey, who was sitting there in a stunned silence, tears glistening in her eyes. “She’s beautiful and sexy and smart. Why the hell would she want to have anything to do with you? I mean, you guys hated each other until you started doing what *I* asked you to. You were there for her because I couldn’t be, Pacey. Whatever you think you’ve got going on with her, you’re just a substitute for me.”

“You give her a lot of credit, Dawson.”

“At least I have something to give her, Pacey. What do you have to offer her, huh? A lovely life in Capeside with dysfunctional in-laws and the town drunk for a husband?”

Andie stood up quickly and stepped between them. “Stop it. Right now. Pacey, you swing at him, you’re out of school.”

“And there’s something else you could give her, Pace. A complete lack of education.”

“Please, Pacey?” He looked down at Andie’s serious face and nodded. He stepped back, away from Dawson, refusing to look at his friend.

Andie turned to Dawson. “Why don’t you go cool off?”

“Joey?” Dawson ignored Andie and looked at Joey. She had stood up and was staring down at the ground. “Joey? Talk to me.”

Her hazel eyes were full of tears when she did look up, sending them cascading down her cheeks. “I need you to leave me alone, Dawson.”

“You don’t…”

Pacey reached out a hand toward her and she shook her head, stepping out of his reach. “Not now, Pacey. Not…” She turned and ran off, leaving the three of them standing there, staring after her.

My best friend.

Don’t get me wrong, I fully expected the Dawson Leery denial, not to mention the personal attack. Ever since he came back to town, it’s been obvious that he’s not the sweet, innocent guy he used to be. It’s also clear that, while as friends my family, lifestyle, sexual experience and lack of the better things in life don’t matter, when it comes to moving in on what he considers his property, they do.

And none of it would matter if I knew how Joey felt. I mean, prior to lunch, I got the impression what’s between us wasn’t something she wanted to acknowledge.

But when Dawson brought it up, she didn’t deny it. Not that she had much chance with all the macho posturing.

Of course, she didn’t confirm anything either.

I walk over to my truck, grabbing the ticket Deputy Doug left on my windshield. Pulling open the door, I sit on the seat and stare down at my hands.

As much as I liked to deny everything Dawson said, he didn’t say anything that wasn’t true…or had the potential to be, anyway.

Especially the part about what there is between us. I’ve been falling for Joey since before our freshman year. Even with all of my…activity that year, I spent more than my fair share of time thinking, well…fantasizing about Joey.

But she never showed any interest in me until this year, after I did Dawson his favor.

I clench my fists, digging my short nails into my palms. I want to slam the door to the truck and drive away.

I want to go back in time and never make that damn promise to Dawson.

But most of all, I want to know what’s going on inside Joey’s head.

Andie glared daggers in Dawson’s direction throughout the entirety of their last class. As soon as the bell rang, she moved over to his desk before he could stand. “What’s wrong with you?”

“With me?” Dawson stood and started out of the classroom. “My question is why aren’t you angrier? I thought you were in love with Pacey.”

“First of all, Dawson, you don’t have anything to be upset about. You suggested Pacey…or rather, suggested it couldn’t be then the two of you turned into Capeside’s very own version of the WWF.”

“So?”

“You didn’t even give Joey an opportunity to say anything.”

“She could have denied it.”

“Would you have believed her?” Andie’s own disbelieving tone kept Dawson silent. “Besides, you and Joey split up. Mutual decision. You don’t seem to mind AJ. Why would you care if she was dating Pacey?”

“Pacey’s been my best friend most of my life, Andie. He knows how I feel about Joey.”

“Would that be the not seeing her as a woman until two years ago Joey or…”

“I see her as a woman now. Pacey knows that.”

“But do you have any idea how Pacey sees her, Dawson?”

“So you’re saying there is something.” Dawson’s eyes narrowed. “I knew it.”

“No.” Andie shook her head, sighing. “I know Pacey likes Joey. I know they’re friends. And that’s all you know too.”

“I know there’s more.”

“I also know they’re your friends…”

“I don’t know.” Both of them turned to look at Joey who was leaning against the bank of lockers opposite them. “After that diatribe against Pacey, I think there might be some question in Pacey’s mind regarding how Dawson really feels.”

“Joey!” Dawson stepped forward, stopping when she moved out of his reach. “I…”

“No Dawson. It’s my turn. I didn’t get to say anything during your temper tantrum, so now I’m turning the tables. What you said today was completely and totally uncalled for. How do you think it made Pacey feel to have you assault him like that?”

“I wasn’t assaulting him, Joey. I was telling it like it is.”

“Is that what you really think of him? Was it lies every time you told him that you were proud of something he’d accomplished, that you were glad to have him as your friend? Are you that much of an ass, Dawson, that you’d completely blow off the person who has stuck by you through everything just because you jumped to a conclusion you didn’t like?”

“Tell me this, Joey. Did I jump to a conclusion that was incorrect?”

Joey met Dawson’s eyes without hesitation. “Pacey and I are friends. Maybe something more. But whatever we are, has nothing to do with you. Unless our friendship means so little to you that the thought of us being anything other than sparring partners is enough to end it.”

“Are you dating him?” Dawson refused to look away. “Sleeping with him?”

Joey took a deep breath. “It’s none of your business.”

“That sounds like a yes to me. How quickly the righteous fall. I thought you were saving yourself for something special, Joey. I guess I was wrong.”

“Why does it bother you so much, Dawson? You’ve moved on. You’ve managed to find new people to like, to kiss, to endeavor to lose that pesky virginity to. Why can’t I?”

“I’m not trying to do it with Pacey!”

“I should hope not.” Pacey walked up, ignoring everyone but Dawson. “I’m afraid we’re not each other’s type.”

“Pacey…” Joey warned him. He looked at her for a long minute then shrugged and stepped back. Joey turned back to Dawson. “Dawson, I’m not trying to hurt you here, but you’ve got to realize that whatever it is between us? It’s not what either of us needs right now. We need different things, different people.”

“Does it have to be Pacey?”

Joey grinned. “Well, I never said it was Pacey. You just decided it couldn’t be and he presented a hypothetical situation, which then got blown out of proportion in a typically Dawson sort of way.”

“So it’s not Pacey?”

“I didn’t say that either.”

“Joey, I don’t want to play guessing games with you,” Dawson sighed with irritation. “Can’t you give me a straight answer?”

“Not yet.” She reached out and took his hand. “As soon as I know what I’m thinking and feeling Dawson, you’ll know. And as soon as I’m sure of who I’m thinking and feeling it about, you’ll know that too. I won’t say you’ll be the first to know, but you’ll be at the top of my list.” She glanced at her watch and scowled. “Now, I’ve got to get to detention. Thank you, Mr. Witter.”

Pacey grinned and shrugged. “I live to serve.” He walked past her, catching her eye for a brief second, unanswered questions in the blue depths. “See you there.”

Dawson watched him walk away before looking at Joey again. “I’ll be honest, Jo. I don’t know that I can handle you falling for Pacey.”

She smiled weakly, “Who says that you’ll have a choice?”

Walking away from Dawson feels like walking through freezing cold water. I know exactly how Kate and Leo felt during the filming of ‘Titanic’ now, trying to get somewhere only to have something holding you back.

I can feel his hurt and confusion like an anchor, holding onto me. I can sense him looking at me as I walk down the hall until I turn the corner.

And there’s Pacey.

His blue eyes are concerned and the questions are still there, but I can also see that he trusts me. And, if I have any clue about men, which I don’t really pretend that I do, I think I see something else there in the maelstrom of emotion.

And I realize that falling for Pacey wasn’t something I could have stopped. I’m just surprised it took me so long.

He reaches out and takes my hand as we walk down the hallway to the detention room. I hold onto him tightly, not wanting to talk. If we get into a conversation, I’m going to have to say things I don’t know that I’m ready to. I’m going to have to face up to his questions about Dawson and me, about my feelings for my best friend.

And then I’m going to have to tell him that I’m in love with him and hope that he believes it.

You’d think, after all this time, he’d know when I’m telling the truth, but I think when it comes to emotion, none of us are as smart as we think we are. We’re so wrapped up in what’s going on inside of us that we don’t always see what the other person is going through, what they’re feeling.

Besides, after my startling lack of ability to simply tell Dawson to his face that I’m in love with Pacey…or even involved with Pacey, for that matter, I can see why he’d be…a little disbelieving?

But it doesn’t change the fact that I love him. I want him.

I just have to figure out a way to prove it.

The minute hand finally moved and the bell rang. Pacey stood up immediately and stretched, watching Joey as she did the same. Her long, lithe body curved back and he remembered the last time she’d arched her back in his presence.

His body responded in its traditional manner and he groaned inwardly. Now he was supposed to sit next to her and let her practice her driving while he tried desperately *not* to think of his hard-on and the gorgeous creature who caused it.

How did he get himself into these things?

Grabbing his jacket, he held it in front of him as he walked over to her. They waited until the rest of the students had left before making their way to the door. “You still up for some road rage, Josephine?”

“The only rage I ever have is directed at you, Pacey. So as long as I don’t find any mountainsides to sideswipe, you should make it through the afternoon alive.”

“Your concern warms the cockles of my heart.”

“It’s not your cockles that you’re worried about.” Silence fell for a long moment until Joey started giggling. “That…that didn’t come out right.”

Pacey smiled. “You sure about that?”

She slapped his arm then bumped into him. Pacey wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they walked the rest of the way to the truck, Joey still giggling slightly. When they got there, he reached into his pocket, only to stop when she put her hand on his. He could feel her touch through the denim, which caused his earlier problem to worsen.

“I’ve got my own.” She held up her other hand, the key he’d given her that morning dangling from the key ring.

Pacey nodded, trying desperately to restrain himself from grabbing her and pinning her to the truck, showing her how she affected him. “Right. I almost forgot.”

She moved away and unlocked the passenger door for him. “So, you think I can make it over to my house without getting a ticket?”

“I hope so. I already have one to show for today’s adventure.”

“Oh Pacey,” She met his eyes. “I’m sorry. I’ll help pay for it. It was my fault we were late.”

“Don’t worry about it, Joey. I’m sure that, before the day is done, you’ll manage to wrack up a few of your own as it is.”

“Thank you for that sparkling vote of confidence.”

“Anything for you.”

“Where are we headed?”

He named a semi-remote area near where she lived. “We should be safe out there. Little chance of Capeside’s finest digging through the backroads just to throw the two of us in the slammer.”

“For someone who didn’t manage to get his driver’s license on exactly the first try, you sure are milking this for all it’s worth.” She poked him in the ribs. “What’s the matter? The instructor a male? Couldn’t use that Witter charm?”

“Keep it up, Potter and I’m likely to use it on you.”

“May the good Lord deliver me from such a horrible fate.”

“Shut up and drive, Joey.”

“Yes sir.”

It’s quiet, except for the sound of her stripping gears. The birds have all been scared away, the bugs are silent, hoping that she doesn’t home in on their hiding places. Even the fish in the creek nearby have probably headed for deeper water just to get away from that lovely noise.

I want to reach over and just turn the car off so that she’ll give up for a while, but I know if I even attempt to do that I’m likely to lose an arm…or something else I find valuable. I can feel her frustration radiating off her in waves.

She knows how to do this. She’s done it before. Obviously something is upsetting her, and I have a strong suspicion I know what it is.

Or should I say who it is.

Dawson Leery.

Even when he’s not around, he manages to ruin everything. I thought, when she’d stood up to him this afternoon, when she’d joked with me on the way to the car, that we could at least talk about whatever it is between us. But I have a feeling its back to business as usual, or worse, business as it was before our current usual.

I have a sneaky suspicion that, whatever he said after I left, Dawson might have persuaded Joey that I’m a bad idea.

I really need to find a new set of friends.

Joey turned off the car and sighed, resting her head on the steering wheel. “It’s hopeless.”

“I was just thinking the same thing,” Pacey responded sadly.

“I can’t drive this monstrosity.”

“What?” His head snapped up and he looked over at her quickly.

“This truck. It’s a hazard to everyone’s health, not to mention my sanity. I think you’re actually trying to kill me or something and you’re using this truck to do the dirty deed. I may die of annoyance.”

“I thought that was just me.”

She grinned at his small smile. “Well, you do have that going for you.” She sat up and turned slightly so that she was facing him. “Pacey, can I ask you something?”

“I don’t know. Am I going to like the question?”

“Well, it has to do with this weekend…sort of.”

“Does it have to do with Dawson?” He tried to keep his tone light, but knew from her look that he’d failed miserably. “Because, after lunch, I don’t think I can handle any more of Mr. Leery.”

“Anything that has to do with us is going to have to do with Dawson, Pacey. He’s our friend.”

“He’s your friend. He’s my judge, jury and executioner.”

“He was upset…”

Pacey held up his hand. “Don’t. I can’t sit here and listen to you make excuses for him. What he said today, Joey, it hurt. I always seem to forget how much Dawson holds against me until the moment he uses it again.”

“I’m not trying to defend him.”

“He was upset? Yeah, he was upset Joey. Because he sees me making a move on you, who he considers to be his private property. He’s upset because if I get you then he doesn’t have anyone to fall back on. He doesn’t have the girl across the creek anymore because she’s with someone else. Someone she’s known just as long, someone she might love just as much. But it’s funny because you don’t. You never will because just like him, all you see is Dawson.”

“That’s not…”

“So, why don’t you get out of the car so that I can slide over, drive you home and get the hell out of your life so that you and Dawson can get back to your dance?”

“Pace…”

He shook his head, closing his eyes against the tears that threatened. “No. Enough Joey. It’s just…it’s enough, okay? I can’t do it anymore.”

“Do what?”

“This!” He gestured to her. “You and me and this…this charade. I can’t pretend anymore.”

“Pretend what? To be my friend?”

“No! Pretend I’m not in love with you!”

Joey’s eyes widened. “You…you love me?”

“No.” Pacey shook his head, stopping only when Joey’s hand touched his chin. She’d moved closer, until there was barely any room between them. “I don’t.”

His gaze met hers and held, his words obviously lies in the light of his eyes. “I love you too.”

He caught his breath in a sort of soft sob. “Don’t Joey. Please?”

“Don’t love you?”

“Don’t lie to me.”

She leaned in, brushing her lips against his. Pulling back so there was just a breath of space between them, she softly asked, “Does this feel like a lie, Pacey?”

“Joey…”

She kissed him again, a little bit longer. “Does it?”

The tears he’d been holding slipped through his long lashes as he shook his head imperceptibly. “No. Nothing like a lie.”

Joey smiled and pulled away slightly, raising her hand to wipe away his tears. Pacey managed a smile as well. “So what does this mean, Potter?”

“I think it means something along the lines of me not caring what Dawson says or thinks. Something about the fact that what matters now is how we feel about each other.”

His smiled changed into a smirk. “Until we get back to Capeside?”

“No.”

“Joey, you’re going to have to face up to the fact that what you’re suggesting, in the light of Dawson’s overwhelming disapproval…”

“Dawson says he wants me to be happy. You’ll just have to make me happy.”

“Dawson says he wants you to be happy. What Dawson means is that he wants to be the one making you happy.”

“Pacey?” Joey placed her hand on his chest, forcing him to lean back against the door of the truck. “Can I ask you a question?”

She moved onto her knees, leaning over his reclining body. Pacey struggled to breathe, as her warmth seemed to covering him, increasing the need in his already aching body. “Yeah.”

“Are we going to keep fighting about Dawson?”

“Fighting is a great way to keep passion in a relationship,” he offered, his eyes locked with hers.

Joey nodded, not looking away as she moved back, letting her hand trail down his chest and stomach until she reached his belt buckle. Unfastening it, she smiled knowingly. “So’s this.”

All I can hear is him breathing. All I can feel is him trembling. It’s funny. I thought that whenever I did something like this, it would be about me; what I was feeling and thinking. Instead, as I unfasten his belt, all I can think about is Pacey.

He’s biting his lower hip, his eyes locked on me, his expression a cross between disbelief and nirvana. He looks just as surprised by the fact that I’m seducing him as I am by the act. I never thought I’d be here. Not with him, not like this. I never thought I’d be in some secluded spot, my heart pounding loud enough to fill the silent truck with sound, focused on Pacey, ready to take another step.

I stare at his chest, unsure about meeting his eyes. It’s rising and falling rapidly, the anticipation almost alive between us. My body feels like it’s on fire, burning with a need and desires I don’t quite understand. When I was with Dawson, I’d spent my whole life putting him on this pedestal, letting him represent everything good in the world, everything I knew my family and I weren’t.

With Pacey, he’s just the same guy that has been my friend, my foil, my…everything. And I realize it now. I realize that the guy on the pedestal can only disappoint you. He can only give you so much before you realize he’s human and never going to live up to your ideal.

But this guy, this best friend, this partner in crime…Pacey, he’s the person I can trust, the person who can let me down but never disappoint me. The man who will give me only more than I expect from him, because I know that he’s flawed just as badly as I am.

I find the courage to look up, meeting his eyes. I see his questions, his insecurities. But I also see something else, something that he tried to show me two years ago, something that he’s been trying to show me for a long time.

Pacey’s just as stupidly in love with me as I am with him.

Which means that he’s putty in my hands.

Joey pushed the leather belt out of the way and unfastened the button of his pants. Pacey inhaled sharply, closing his eyes. “Joey…what are you doing?”

The quiet metallic rasping of his zipper filled the truck cab. “Thanking you for the other night.”

He groaned softly, “I didn’t do that to get something in return.”

“And proving to you that I’m not Dawson Leery’s Josephine Potter.”

He refused to look at her, refused to hope. “What are you then?”

“I’m sure that this is what I want. That you are what I want. I’m sure, Pacey.” Her voice, so soft and so sure, forced his eyes to hers. She met his gaze steadily, and he finally let himself see possibility in them. Bracing his foot against the floor, Pacey lifted his body, shivering as Joey’s hands curved over his hips, curling under the waistband and pulling the material down.

Joey shivered as well, closing her eyes. Catching her breath, she forced them open and found herself facing a slow, sexy smile. Pacey reached out and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. His whole body was tight with wanting her. Letting his fingers wind through her hair, he shook his head. “You don’t have to do this, Potter.”

“I know.” She gathered her courage and let her eyes fall from his, moving over his chest then slowly lower. Her heart felt like it might burst from her chest as she let her hands find the bottom of his shirt and push it higher.

“It’s all right, Joey,” he offered, his hand moving to his pants, starting to pull them back up. Joey placed on of her hand on top of his and shook her head. He sighed, “You don’t…”

Meeting his eyes, Joey very carefully wrapped her hand around his erection. “You tellin’ me what to do, Witter?”

A shudder ran through him as he shook his head. Her hand started moving, slowly stroking the hard, smooth skin. “N…no.”

“Good.” Joey leaned forward, a knowing smile on her face. Moving her hand up until it surrounded the tip, she let her tongue dart out, sweeping it across the sensitive flesh.

Pacey groaned, his hips coming off the seat of the truck. He curled his hand around the edges of the leather, squeezing hard, struggling to remain in control. Pressing his lips together, his breath coming in heavy pants, Pacey could barely stop himself from thrusting up toward her. “Oh…” Joey’s hot breath danced across his skin just before her lips parted and she took him in her mouth. “…God…”

Her lips were firm against his skin, stroking him as her tongue moved along the length, tasting his hot flesh. She moved her hand down his thigh, caressing him, showering him with as much attention as he’d lavished on her. Her fingertips trailed across his thighs, moving up the hair-roughened skin.

Pacey clenched and unclenched his hands, aching to touch her, but afraid of being too demanding. Her mouth continued moving, tasting as much of him as she could, sucking gently. Her mouth was hot and tight around him, alternating short, hard strokes with long, tender ones. He pressed his head back against the window as her hand found the base of his erection and held him loosely, beginning to move in tandem with her mouth.

Unable to help himself any longer, he raised his hand to her hair and tangled his fingers in the silky strands. His whole body was shaking with the desire to meet her thrusts with his own, but he continued to resist, the fear of hurting her paramount in the small part of his brain he still managed to retain control of.

Joey’s brow furrowed, sensing that Pacey was holding back on her. Increasing her rhythm, she kept one hand stroking him while the other moved around to stroke the curve of his ass. Pacey cried out as her nails lightly scraped the smooth skin, losing all sense of restraint.

His body moved forward and he released her hair, not wanting to force her. His hand locked on the back of the seat in a death grip as she continued moving her head and hand until he felt his legs go numb. His nerve endings tingled and he knew that he was getting close. He panted her name, trying to gather the strength to push her away from him.

“Jo…Joey, you need to stop.” She shook her head sending a new sensation along his skin. He moaned low in his throat and touched her shoulder. “Joey, honey, I can’t last…much…”

Joey ignored him; wrapping her lips tight around the tip of his cock and letting her hand slip down to brush the skin beneath his swollen flesh.

“Christ…” Pacey thrust forward, losing control completely. His head hit the glass once more as his body arched upward. Joey moved with him, her lips still moving, still tasting, still sucking lightly on him until he stopped thrusting.

Moving back, Joey licked her lips and smiled at Pacey, her whole demeanor nervous. “You…you’re okay?”

“No.” Pacey panted.

“No?” Joey’s face fell.

“I think I’m in heaven.”

“You think they’d let you in?” She grinned in earnest this time. She reached out and touched his hand, surprised at his trembling. “You’re shaking.”

“It’s an aftereffect. You did it too.” He swallowed hard and looked her straight in the eye. “You didn’t have to…”

“I wanted to. How long is it going to take for you to accept that?”

“If I say a while, will you offer to do that again?” Pacey tugged his boxers and pants back up around his waist and refastened them. “Joey…”

“I meant it, Pacey. I’m not Dawson’s Joey.”

He sighed softly, shaking his head. “I wasn’t going to say anything.” He held out his arms. “Come here?”

She moved into his embrace. “I’ve never done anything like this before, Pace. I’m a little scared.”

“Don’t be. I’m here for you. And I swear that I’m not going to pressure you.”

“But you’ve done all of this before, you know what to expect, what you want. And from the little experience I have with this, it seems like that the minute you have a taste of it, you want it more and more.”

“It is addictive, Joey. Hell, you’re addictive. But, I swear to you, you mean more to me than what just happened here.”

She turned her head to see him, “I believe you, Pacey. Which is, I suppose, a good thing.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because, like I said. I’m not Dawson’s Joey anymore.” Closing her eyes, she kissed him softly. “I’m yours.”