The Ocean Between Us
Prologue: Ironic
by: Tinkerbell

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Rating: R (holds for entire series)

Spoilers: Anything if you have not seen all the episodes.

Summary: My fic has an alternate ending for Season 3. What if Joey missed Pacey…?

Author's Note: I just want everyone to know that I am a P/J'er even though I have changed the ending to the wonderful season finale. I promise that there is a method to my madness. The Ocean Between Us is the first of three Pacey/Joey pieces that form my as yet untitled series. The second part is Divided and the third part is Reality…Unrecognizable. Music is an important part of any reading experience for me. This is why there are many songs in my fics. I'll post a soundtrack list at the end of the fic. If you have never heard of Four Star Mary I highly suggest that you visit their website and buy their CD's because they rock. 

Thank You's: Many thanks to my beta readers Tish, Jaymz, J.W., Courtney, Tara, and especially Bitsy. This fic would not be what it is without you. A huge thanks to Serena for making the gorgeous banner. The songs are courtesy of Char Star Lyrics Scene, Song Lyrics Search Engine, The Alternative Music Lyrics Archive and lyrics from the artists' respective CD's. Thanks to Wayne's Episode Guide for transcripts to refer to when I needed them.

Feedback: Pretty please? I love compliments and I take constructive criticism well. Email me at twill007@surfsouth.com.

Want to get myself back in again
The soft dive of oblivion
I want to taste the salt of your skin
The soft dive of oblivion, oblivion

 
July 15, 2000

I cannot believe that this is real. It's something that I never dreamed could ever happen to me. But it has…or at least I hope that it has. Pacey Witter, the eternal screw-up, never gets anything that he wants and I have always wanted Joey Potter…even before I knew it.

Pacey Witter put down his pen and stared out at the ocean. He could not believe how much his life had changed in two days. Pacey had spent all this time believing that Joey had never loved him; then a miracle had happened. Pacey had called Doug to check in with him and she had been there. Joey had grabbed the phone away from Doug and begged Pacey to tell her where he was docking next so that she could meet him.

"I have something that I have to tell you…but it has to be in person."

Pacey felt his heart leap as he remembered Joey's urgent words to him. How could it not be good news? Pacey had refused to tell Joey at first because he believed that she was just toying with him but the urgency in her voice had finally won him over. That had been two days ago and he was now on his way to meet her in Savannah. Pacey was sure that Joey had to be almost there by now…if she wasn't already. Doug was driving her and Pacey knew that Doug could get away with driving well over the speed limit. Plus, Doug had been to Savannah several times and would be able to find the docks easily. Pacey assumed that Jen would probably accompany Joey for support…if she was coming to do what Pacey hoped she was coming to do. 

Pacey was not sure if he should be ecstatic or scared shitless. He loved Joey more than any thing else in the world and he had spent months believing that she didn't love him back. Maybe he had been wrong. That was what Pacey was hoping for anyway. He looked down at the leather-bound journal in his hands and quickly finished his entry.

Could Josephine Potter, the love of my life, actually love me back? My heart bursts with happiness at just the thought of that actually being true. Maybe my luck is changing.
Pacey smiled as he closed the journal and stuck it under his seat. It had been the last thing that he had been expecting from Joey and what made it so ironic was that he had bought Joey one exactly like it except that hers was black and his was brown. Pacey had spent over an hour in Boston at the mall trying to decide what to buy Joey for Christmas. It wasn't that Joey was a hard person to buy for, he just couldn't find the perfect gift for her. Usually he got her a stuffed animal, some scented candles or a paintbrush but this year was different. His feelings towards her had changed, or at least he'd thought they had, when in reality he had always been in love with her. Inside the bookstore Pacey had seen a small display in a far corner that housed a selection of leather journals. He had gone over to them as if something was urging him to buy one for her. Pacey had not been sure what had made him buy the journal then but looking back on that day now he knew what his reason had been. Joey believed that when she spoke that no one listened and he had wanted to show her that he heard her. The journal was thick with a leather cover that zipped up to keep it safe from unwanted smudges and unexpected accidents. It had cost Pacey twenty bucks but the price had not fazed him at all. He'd taken it home, wrapped it in beautiful paper with angels on it and tied it up with a silver bow. Pacey smiled at the memory of taking the present to Joey as he sailed towards what he hoped would be their future together.

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated
I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above
I'll be your crying shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life.

The temperature was just above freezing as Pacey stood on the porch at the Potter's on Christmas night waiting for someone to answer the door.

Joey opened the door and stared at him in surprise. "Pacey? What are you doing here?"

Pacey shoved his hands in his coat pockets. "Can I come in Jo? Or are you gonna make me stand out here until I freeze and you use me as your human snowman?"

Joey smiled and gestured for him to come in.

"Thanks," he said, brushing past her and going into the living room.

Joey closed the door and went to stand next to him by the fire. "So…what's up Pace?"

"What do you mean," he asked nervously.

Joey rolled her eyes. "Well…you usually don't come over to my house at ten-thirty at night just to say hello."

"Am I bothering you?"

"Absolutely."

Pacey's face fell. "Oh."

Joey grinned and poked him in the ribs. "But you always bother me Pacey and I always bother you. What else is new?"

Pacey smiled in relief.

"So…did you come over here just to irritate me or does this 'bothering' have a purpose?"

"Yeah. It does." Pacey reached into his jacket and pulled out her present. "Here. I got this for you." He placed the gift in her hands and went to sit on the couch.

Joey looked at him incredulously for a moment. Then she smiled and went over to the Christmas tree that still had one present under it. She picked it up and brought it over to the couch. "I got this for you."

Pacey looked at her, obviously shocked. "Jo, you didn't have to get me anything."

Joey growled at him. "Witter, we always get each other lame gifts for Christmas. It's tradition. Except…" Joey trailed off.

"Except that we usually all do it together and get a big laugh out of it," Pacey finished for her.

"Yeah." Joey sat down on the couch next to him and they were silent for a moment.

"Well, are you going to open it or not," Pacey finally asked. His stomach was in knots and he couldn't quite figure out why.

"Yeah. Are you going to open yours?"

"Yeah."

They looked at each other for a moment and then tore into their gifts. Joey looked down at the beautiful black journal that lay in the tissue paper and then looked back up at Pacey. He was staring at her with the same incredulous look that she was sure was etched across her own face. Then they burst into laughter.

"Well Potter," Pacey said as he wiped the tears off his cheeks. "I must say. This is a first."

"Yeah," Joey agreed, holding her stomach.

When they finally calmed down they looked at each other curiously.

"Don't ask," Pacey said before she could even start to ask the question that was on the tip of both of their tongues. "I don't know."

"Ditto," Joey agreed.

They lapsed into silence for a few moments. Finally, Pacey got to his feet and started walking towards the door. Joey got up and followed him.

"I guess I should get going," he said softly as he stuck his gift inside his coat. "Thanks Joey."

"You're welcome," she replied. "Thank you too."

"You're welcome," he said looking into her eyes.

Joey looked away uncomfortably and groaned.

"What is it," Pacey asked, thinking that something was wrong.

Joey pointed above their heads and Pacey looked up. They were standing under the mistletoe that Bessie had nailed above the front doorway.

Pacey gulped. "We don't have to you know," he began.

Joey rolled her eyes. "It's tradition," she said leaning over and pecking him on the lips.

They both jumped back from the slight electrical charge that surged between them and stared at each other. Joey turned red and Pacey let out his breath in a long sigh.

"I'm gonna go," he said walking out onto the porch.

"Yeah," she agreed. "Merry Christmas Pacey."

"Merry Christmas Joey."

Pacey smiled. A few weeks later he had sat all night by the fire and watched Joey sleep, accepting the fact that he was madly in love with her. If things turned out the way that Pacey was hoping they would today, he would ask Joey what she had done with her journal.

When I see your face
My eyes just dilate
But I can't erase
That I want to violate
Every bit and everything and every part of you

I've suffered enough
It's killing me

Pacey looked out over the water. Savannah was only about an hour away now. He checked his watch. It was six o' clock. They had agreed to meet at seven. Pacey hoped that she would get there first and would be waiting on him. He would sail up to the dock and she would be standing on the end of the pier with her hair billowing around her. Joey would see him and wave. Pacey would tie the boat up and step onto the dock. Joey would run up to him and fling herself into his arms crying, telling him that she loved him and that she was sorry that she hadn't stopped him when he'd asked her to. She would look at him with her gorgeous eyes and kiss him. Then Pacey would have to tell her to pinch him so that he could be sure that he wasn't dreaming.

BOOM!

The sound knocked Pacey out of his daydream and he looked up at the sky. A storm had developed out of nowhere and the wind was blowing persistently.

"OH SHIT!"

Pacey frantically began trying to maneuver the boat through the rough waves. It was useless. The sea was tossing the small sailboat like a dog tossing a chew toy. Pacey had the distinct feeling that he would never make it out of this. His thoughts immediately turned to Joey. Her beautiful face filled his head. God how he loved her no matter what had happened or how much he tried not to. Now, he would never know what it was that she had wanted to tell him, or if they could have been together for the rest of their lives or even have rebuilt their friendship. Pacey saw the wave seconds before it came crashing down, sending him flying through the air and capsizing the boat, breaking it to pieces.

The angry boy, a bit too insane, icing over a secret pain
You know you don't belong
You're the first to fight, you're way too loud
You're the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know something's wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason to say put the past away

Pacey's heart was heavy as he realized that he would never be able to repair his friendship with Dawson-or Joey. This was it. This was where he got on the bus. Pacey had time to chuckle at his minds reference to the movie Heart and Souls where a bus driver came to pick up all the spirits to take them to heaven. Would he be going to heaven? He'd done some pretty damnable things. Maybe he would go to hell and burn for his sins for all eternity. Or maybe he'd be like Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense and he wouldn't know he was dead until he'd helped someone and they showed him the truth.

Pacey's life flashed before his eyes. He saw Joey, Dawson and he playing as toddlers, swimming in the creek when they were eight, sleeping over at Dawson's, Dawson and he and building their fort. He got older and he remembered meeting Jen, the affair with Tamara, meeting Andie, falling in love with her and turning his life around, his father's rejection of him, his father and he making amends, standing up for Jack, movie night, becoming good friends with Jen…and then there was Joey. He saw her as a child, as she grew up and turned into a stunning woman. He saw himself watching her sleep, realizing that he was in love with her, helping her paint over her mural, kissing her on the side of the road, sleeping next to her at Aunt Gwen's, kissing her by the fire. He saw Dawson's face when he had learned the truth, his brother Doug, Buzz and their talks, fixing up True Love, dancing with Joey at prom, painting "Ask me to stay" on the wall that he had rented for Joey…her face.

Pacey lifted his head out of the water and yelled the only word that he could think of.

"JOEY!"

Then everything went black.

prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | epilogue

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